Monday, March 9, 2009


I really do love Trader Joe's. We buy about 90% of our groceries there so I am there often. Roxie goes through perishable items so quickly.....bananas, yogurt, cheese, milk, etc. But I have about had it with the damn balloons! It is the same thing every time. The cashier offers Roxie a balloon, she says yes, the cashier gets the balloon and then Roxie wants nothing to do with the is now mommies balloon. I don't want a freaking balloon....especially not everytime we got to Trader Joe's which is at least twice a week. So a couple of months ago I decided that we were done with the balloons at Trader Joe's. Sounds simple, right? You just say no to the balloon. If only it were that simple. Today for example we ventured to our local tj's. We finish loading up on our goods and head to the cash register. As we approach I am feeling confident, today will be the day. I am not leaving this place with a damn balloon! The cashier does her duty and asks if my daughter would like a balloon. I smile and say, "No thanks, she doesn't really like them". She laughs, we chat, she gives Roxie some stickers (something she does like, but Matt hates that they are plastered all over the backseat of the car......stickers are obviously not my battle when I have balloons to deal with) and all is well with the world. Until overy happy bagger guy enters the picture. Overly happy bagger guy talks with Roxie, asks her about a balloon (totally not hearing me or the nice cashier telling him she doesn't need one) and then proceeds to get one for her. She of course won't touch it so he ties it to the cart. The cashier and I look at eachother and smile......I tried, she tried, but we lost to overly happy bagger guy. To my amazement, up walks even happier new cashier guy who proceeds to tie a second balloon to Roxie's first balloon all while talking about how fun balloons are. Let me tell you....balloons are not so much fun! Not only do I now have to hold not one but two balloons but I have to worry about not letting them go for fear of killing dolphins (is that really true or was someone in the 5th grade spreading lies?) while I put two kids in the car and all of my groceries. I then have to figure out where to put the freaking balloons. Do they fit in the trunk? Can I get them to stay on the floorboard of the car? It makes me nervous having them inside the car...they always end up floating somewhere totally not okay and I am forced to bat it out of my way over and over during the ride home. And what if they popped in the car? I hate it when balloons pop. Remember that "fun" party game where kids sit on balloons until they pop? So not okay with me. Once I finally arrive home with my uninvited guest balloons....the inevitable happens. A neighbor drives by just as I am opening the trunk (I managed to squeeze them in this time) and as I look up to wave, the balloons are set free. I watch them float up as I think....that's it, next time.....we are NOT getting a balloon. Seriously people!


Tawnya said... one ever offers us a ballooon at Trader Joe's. I guess I have too damn many kids :) Have you seen this: It's hilarious and oh so true. You could add your own verse: It's that f#%$&ing balloon I don't want anymore :)

Aida Rita said...

Funny ... we went to Trader Joes today and Ana said she did not want a balloon. YEAH !!! She did ask for stickers, but I can deal with those.